The Misunderstood Proudass

Yes I have been talking about being a proud person, but not because of materials, but because of my pride.

But whenever I feel that people are looking at me coz of what I wear or carry with me, I will try my best to not act as if it is ok, coz it's not! you may not know what the other party was thinking, even though they may don a face of admiration or curiosity.

I learnt this on a ride home from school one day with my JC friend Jeremy. It was a rainy day and the ends of my long pants were wet, even though I have an umbrella. When we boarded the bus, we proceeded to sit at the end as we ususally do. There were two secondary school girls with us on the end seat, but we took no notice of them and continued on with our conversation. It was uncomfortable to have the pants sticking to my skin, so I held the flap and fanned it hoping it will dry faster.

When the bus approached one of the stops, the girls beside us alight, but not without passing a scornful remark at me, "Converse so what, hao lian!"

We were stunned by this remark, and indeed I was the one wearing my white converse shoe which costed $89, but I regretted buying it coz it didnt go well with my JC uniform.. but quite good with my secondary school's. What I'm saying is, I hold no regard for my pair of shoes, and certainly felt that there's no need to show off in it coz it's not that great anyway.. not like it's a limited edition shoe costing in the hundreds region that I would scream to the world "HEY EVERYONE OF U PEASANTS! COME LOOK WHAT WHAT YOUR FATHER IS WEARING HERE MAN~! THIS COSTED ME $10M MONOPOLY DEAL DOLLARS!"

So ah.. I was misunderstood for showing off my shoe to the girls.. it didnt feel good. It may be viewed as something valuable, or rather something the girls may want to have. But this thaught me to be wary of my surroundings; to be more than humble enough so that people will not see you as a proudass. YES more than humble enough.. meaning you must be humbler than humble, and you cannot act normal.

Whoa but it's gonna be damn tiring to be constantly wary of what others may think, what ever happened to being yourself? yes it is tiring, but after awhile it will become second nature to you. There are times you can be yourself, so just screw it and think nothing about it. It's all based on your mood.

Don't get me started with the ITE kids-wannabe-gangster who tried to screw with me in the bus.. Bottomline, I'm sure I can break his back like breaking a tooth pick.

Sigh the complexities of human and our actions. I always tell myself, the day that I fully understand human behavoir, especially those foolish things that they do and what's gone through their heads while doing it, is the day I become a sage.

Regards,
Seamus "Humbler than humble" Koh